Day #30- Miller Lite

I didn't buy this beer. I wouldn't. It was in my fridge, courtesy of Adam Zinke. I don't even think he bought it. However, I need to review this beer.

From the unhealthy urine color of the pour, the absence of any head to the highly metallic aluminum taste, Miller Lite delivers on every level of complete disgust.

I felt like I was disrespecting my beer glass as I poured it, eyeing its color as I have eyed many other beers, many great beers, and felt ashamed with my first sip.

It tastes like a can out of the bottle. That's special. It also delivers a quick spread of Reynolds Wrap intensity across the teeth, then dies, withers and makes you wonder if you even drank a beer.

Miller Lite, you are a disgrace. From your rampant advertising, exploiting the ignorance of beer drinkers everywhere with your "Hops of Three". How dare you.

The bottle says "Triple Hops Brewed". Congratulations. You are using three different types of hops. Sometimes my diarrhea has three different colors in it, but it's still shit.



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I give Miller Lite a well deserved 17.




Look: Unhealthy Urine
Smell: Metal
Taste: Aluminum Foil, Lead from a number two pencil, a 9 volt battery


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Brett's ratings are out of 100.

*Please understand that ratings on this scale have been influenced by my scholastic history of grading. A grade below 75 is not good, it is less than average. A beer below 60 is bad. Beers in the 90s are in the upper-echelon of beers on this earth, and above 95- divinely inspired.*

As with all connoisseurs, personal taste affects all ratings. The best ratings tend to lean towards his two different biases; 1) Well-crafted heavy Stouts and 2) Lagers made with a simple perfection.

Please understand that just because Brett gives a beer a high rating doesn't mean you may think it is good. Only understand that if he gives it a high rating it is because most people who have a good taste in beer would do the same.